Please show me your attitude
Developing the leader within you.
Jhon C. Maxwell
The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than the education than money, than circumstances than failures, than successes, than what other people think said or do. It is more important than the appearance, giftedness, or skill. It will make or break a company, a church, or a home.
The remarkable thing is that we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past, Nor we can change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We also cannot change the inevitable. The only thing that we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.
I am convinced that life is 10 percent what happens to me and 90 percent how I react to it. And so it is with you – we are in charge of our attitudes.
Having the right attitude gives us the extra plus in life, they also make the difference in leading others. Leadership has less to do with position than it does with disposition. Great leaders understand that the right attitude will set the right atmosphere, which enables the right responses from others.
At the University of Oxford, they called together three professors together and said, “Because you three teachers are the finest in the system, and you have the greatest expertise, we’re going to give you ninety high-IQ students. We’re going to let you move these students through this next year at their own space and see how much they can learn.”
Everyone was delighted, professors and students.
Over the next year, professors and students enjoyed themselves, the students were benefiting from the close attention and instruction from the highly teachers, and the professors were teaching to the brightest students.
By the end of the experiment, the students had achieved 20 to 30 percent more than the others students in the whole area.
At the end of the experiment, the principal of the campus called the three professors and told them, ” I have a confession to make. You didn’t have ninety of the most intellectually prominent students. So we took ninety students randomly from the system and gave them to you.”
The professors said, “this means that we are exceptional teachers.”
The principal continued, “I have another confession. You are not the brightest of the teachers. Your names were the first three names drawn out the hat.”
The teachers asked. What made the difference? Why the students perform so well the whole year?
The difference, of course, was the professor’s expectations. Our expectations have a great deal to do with our attitudes. And these expectations may be totally false, but they will determine our attitudes.
This reminds me of the time in the sales days we have in my school. We have a three-day competition, where we need to sell some products, our school is divided by teams or companies, the idea is to try to win the match and defeat the other companies in our school.
Short story my company didn’t win the competition, but I can say the time of the conquest saw the attitude of some of my friends and wasn’t the right attitude the whole atmosphere was heavy, and the faces of the new students weren’t happy at all.
We talked about it, and some of my friends admitted they didn’t feel good, and yes, they showed the wrong attitude.
“The only thing we can control is our Attitude.”
Just remember, you can not control all the things around you. For example, in business, you can not control if your supplier on the other side of the world has some problems in their production and cannot deliver their product on time. Or the activity you are doing is not the one you want to do. So you can not control the situation you are in, but you can control your attitude. It is the same thing in teamwork. Maybe you think you have the wrong teamwork ever, perhaps you do, or perhaps you don’t, but your attitude will be a game-changer.
In team learning in Proakatemia, we learned to speak directly, and we learned to talk about our feelings,
which I believe is a great opportunity and creates a safe space to talk about feelings on our team. Still, I need to remember my attitude in my team can affect the whole group dynamic. I can create a bad atmosphere for the rest of the day or even weeks. That is because I believe it is so important to ask for feedback about our attitude in the team.
I notice our attitudes can not determine how we feel. However, there is a great difference between how we feel and how we handle our feelings. Everyone has times when they feel bad. Our attitudes cannot stop our feelings, but they can keep our feelings from stopping us.
If we allow the wrong feelings to control us, they can change our way of thinking and our mindset., and our chances for success are none. We can not continue to function or work in the stage where we don’t truly believe in ourselves. It’s our attitude that makes the difference. People with negative thinking may start well, have a few good days, and win a match. But sooner or later, their attitude will pull them down.
Going to the battle with the wrong mindset, you have a 100 percent chance you will lose. But, on the other hand, going to your team with the wrong attitude will affect the whole team.
Our goals, destinations dreams in life will never be determined by our high expectations or complaining behavior. Life is full of surprises, and the adjustment of our attitudes is a lifelong project.
The pessimist complains about the wind.
The optimist expects it to change.
The Leader adjusts the sails.
I’m not trying to give the same message that toxic positivism gives you, you know?
- Think happy thoughts only.
- Just stay positive.
- See good in everything.
- Failure is not an option.
- Dump those negative feelings.
I like to think of negativity as a jar. Every time you experience thoughts or feelings. This jar gets filled a little more each time. Eventually, suppose your jar gets too full. In that case, the negativity will find a way in your life… one way or another, the more you avoid your negative thoughts, the bigger they grow, and the more you reinforce your tendencies to ignore negativity. But we aren’t only happy humans. We’re sad. Angry. Fearful. Anxious.
I think we need to express our feelings and our frustrations, but How is your attitude to them.
I don’t say it is easy to have the right attitude. It requires time, and exercises bring the right attitude requires you to acknowledge your feelings and name them, and requires you can express as clearly as possible how you feel.
Viktor Frankl, an Austrian psychiatrist, and psychotherapist developed the psychological approach known as logotherapy. The basis of Frankl’s theory was that an individual’s primary motivation is the search for meaning in life and that the primary purpose of psychotherapy should be to help the individual find that meaning. in his book Man’s Search for Meaning, he wrote about our attitudes to circumstances.
Victor Frankl was terribly mistreated in a Nazi concentration camp. His words to his persecutors have been an inspiration to millions of people. He said:
“The one thing you cannot take away from me is the way I choose to respond to what you do to me. The last of one’s freedoms is to choose one’s attitude in any given circumstance.”
There will be Suffering. It’s how we React to Suffering that Counts. Frankl claims that one finds meaning in life through three ways. Through work, especially when that work is both creative in nature and aligned with a purpose greater than ourselves. Through love, which often manifests itself in the service of others. And through suffering, which is fundamental to the human experience. It is this third category that was put to the ultimate test through Frankl’s experience in the concentration camp.
Maybe they are not the problem maybe is my attitude to problems.
Maxwell, John C. 1993. Developing the leader within you. Nashville: T. Nelson. Read 07.11.2021.
I want to dedicate this essay to my mom, the bravest and kind woman I have ever met.
Always encouraging and motivating me.
Love you, Mom.