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Emotions make your business and work community stronger

Kirjoittanut: Jemina Laitinen - tiimistä FLIP Solutions.

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Tunteet ei kuulu työpaikalle
Camilla Tuominen
Esseen arvioitu lukuaika on 5 minuuttia.

Life is crowded already with stress and rush what people don’t need or want anymore. Real encounters in which emotions would be honestly expressed is what we are looking for nowadays. (Tuominen, 2020.) These days life is busy in any sector of life. Speed and stress are words that express life last couple of years. It looks like that continuing, fast development of the world is not going to slow down but speed up. People are getting tired and feel unwell under permanent pressure to be in a hurry and excessive stress. Hastiness and fastness are not paying regard to the nature of human beings to be seen and heard. That is important to pay attention to when the goal is to build a successful business or work community. 

We already know that manual work and knowledge by books are not enough in nowadays work life. According to Tuominen (2020), knowledge by books is not enough anymore. Even though openness to the world, experiences and ongoing learning are necessary parts of life, it is not enough. Every human being can act by logical reasoning, and in the future, it is an ordinary routine from machines. (Tuominen, 2020.) In the work community, leadership and customer service, a key point is to meet another person with emotion. That turn business and working in a different direction and make it more complex. Customary fact focused working style doesn’t be enough anymore. For people who are not fact-oriented and are good with people, this is the way they can feel success in the work community because emotion-based skills and abilities are more highlighted and respected in work and business. Sensitivity, empathy and emotion identification is going to be countable skills in work-life as good memory and organizing skills, for example. That can increase the equality of the work community.


Why is it so hard?
We know that emotions are more and more important in the community and part of the work community also. However, it seems to be very challenging to make them a normal part of working life. In the beginning, it sounds that it would be relieving to have an allowance to express emotions in the work community, and it is good for everyone to share their honest feelings. In practice, it turns to be hard to express emotions in a way that does not cause post mortem. Tuominen (2020) says that it is normal to be stuck into surging emotions if there aren’t tools to deal with them and move forward. This is also the main reason why there is fear of facing emotions. We get stuck in negativity and surging of it. (Tuominen, 2020.)

How to make that abstract and human thing a strong part of the work community that doesn’t cause decreasing in professionality?

You are the deputy of your emotions
No one can know how you feel in certain situations or what do you think. Your emotions and your thoughts are your unique thing. That is why it is challenging to understand others without honest talking: No one can know how you feel if you don’t tell them. (Tuominen, 2020.) Many conflicts, problems and issues could have been avoided or solved quickly if there would be honest speak and emotional expression. People read others physical expressions continuously and make speculations based on those. Even though non-verbal communication is a big part of communication, there can be also miscommunication and inaccuracy. 

According to Tuominen (2020), your own emotions and emotional expression can be thought of as the minority of the community. If you don’t adduce the point of view, nobody will do that. That means that the minority of the community won’t have listened. (Tuominen, 2020.) That idea helps to neutralize the emotion load and extravagant expression when the situation of talking about emotions comes. It also helps to understand why it is crucial to open up and say what is in your mind. It is easy to not say anything especially in difficult situations and in tough discussions. However, the only person who can honestly tell how you feel is you. 

Tuominen’s idea highlights the value of an individual’s opinion and emotions. Emotions are abstract but at the same time, they are real for the person who feels them. From that, this idea is also a tool for a listener to neutralize emotional expression. If a deputy of a minority expresses the point of view others haven’t heard before and others can not understand without hearing, the right way to react would be to listen and try to understand. 

Do you know how you feel actually?

The problem of emotional expression is that actually, we don’t know how we feel. The bank of emotions is extensive. That makes it easy to understand, why emotional expression is so hard. If a person by own one doesn’t know what emotion they want to be expressed, how another person can understand it and react to it the right way? 

Tuominen (2020) has a practice that can improve the skills of identifying different emotions. How many of the following words and emotions are in use in your daily life and talk?

Open-minded. Energetic. Visionary. Amused. Acknowledged. Confused. Amazed. Wonderful. Excited. Inspired. Confident. Grateful. Respected. Playful. Touched. Trustful. Happy. Lucky. Optimistic. Fearless. Perky. Peaceful. Beloved. Brave. Gutsy. Hopeful. Important. Calm. Satisfied. Curious. Powerful. Sure. Emancipated. Lively. Proud. Surprised. Baffled. 

Anxious. Melancholy. Exposed. Worthless. Suspicious. Uncomfortable. Desperate. Incredulous. Vulnerable. Contemptuous. Weak. Nervous. Concerned. Ashamed. Hideous. Tense. Jealous. Repentant. Overwrought. Fed up. Impatient. Restless. Mortified. Depressed. Fascinating. Envious. Sorrowful. Embarrassed. Unhappy. Odd. Panicked. Scared. Disappointed. Tiny. Furious. Deficient. Conflicting. Mortified. Unclear. Shocked. Sad. Stressed. Hopeless. Frustrated. Upset. Insensitive. Insecure. Bored. Discontent. Bothered. Angry. Feeble. Careless. Tired. Lonely. Irritated. 

Look at the list above and choose, for example, three emotions you should face in your work community bravery. Then, choose three positive emotions you would like to see more in your work community. Use these words actively and see, if those positive emotions start to appear more in daily life. (Tuominen, 2020.)

The list shows that there are a wide variety of emotions and precise different expressions about feelings, but in daily life, they are mixed. You may identify your feeling as an angriness but the real emotion could be anxiousness or frustration. 

Do this practice with your team and see, if you have the similarities of your list of emotions. Do you agree that you should practise expressing the same emotions and use some words actively?

Face the emotion of another person openly and try to make a conclusion
Facing another person’s emotional reactions isn’t easy, especially when another person has negative feelings or experiences. Tuominen’s (2020) way to face the situation is to listen openly and try to make some conclusion at the end of the discussion. A good way to help another person in the situation is to repeat the story that you have been told. (Tuominen, 2020). 

People are talented to solve their own problems and understanding their reactions by themselves. Usually, they just need help with that. (Tuominen, 2020.) That is the role of the listener in challenging situations. To let another person solve own emotional reaction and problem by oneself. According to Tuominen (2020), the listener can repeat the case with for example this kind of line: “I will rehearse what happened. The case that happened caused that you feel that way. We have talked and the conclusion is to go forward with these actions. Do you agree with that?” (Tuominen, 2020.)

When an emotional situation has a conclusion, it is easier to move forward. It also makes another person feel consistent and safe. If it turns that there isn’t going to be a conclusion and the situation is stuck with emotion, it is good to agree on the time to get back into that topic and let it be overnight (Tuominen, 2020).

Wrap up: The only thing others can not do is be you

Tuominen (2020) highlights the importance of being openly yourself as a person who has emotions. Other people can’t know how you feel if you don’t tell them. It goes both ways. You don’t know how others feels either without listening. (Tuominen, 2020.) It is easy to underrate your own or others’ emotional reactions and it is easy to just be quiet. But it is not the point and just being quiet doesn’t take your work community, your team or yourself forward. Practice your skills to identify different emotions and how to receive emotional reactions from others. Think, that you need to represent your minority, you!

If you want to increase your community and make your workplace more successful and productive, free talk of emotion is the way for that. As Tuominen (2020) says, your customers can sense that freedom from your company also. That makes your business succeed.


Tuominen, C. 2020. Tunteet ei kuulu työpaikalle. Otava audio- and e-book. Published 1.9.2020.

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